Frequently asked questions

This page is regularly updated.  If your question is not answered here, please ask directly.


What is...?  
And what do you mean by...?

I'm often asked to define or clarify the meaning of words like mediation, arbitration, dialogue, forgiveness, conflict-resolution systems design etc. The Lexicon page offers my definitions of the terms I use regularly on this website and in my work, and pointers about where you can learn more about them.  

What topics do you talk, write, and teach about? 

You can find a bird's eye view here.  

Where can I find your articles? 

You can access them from the Books page, or just click here.   

What kinds of conflicts do you mediate?

All kinds, but much of my experience has been in marital, family and divorce mediations; workplace and organizational mediations; and workplace, neighborhood, restorative justice, and organizational mediations.

I am new to mediation and conflict-resolution explorations, where do you recommend I start?  

I have written several books and a Training Manual, available electronically on Amazon, and developed a couple of primers to support people who are getting started.  I hope you find them helpful. My newsletter updates also offer tips and tools in digestible bite size installments. 

I am an experienced mediator wishing to get involved in supporting community and public / political conversations.  Do you have suggestions about where or how I could do that?      

Yes, you could start by visiting the community page to learn about some interesting initiatives already under way.  You could contact organizations like Mediators Beyond Borders, Essential Partners, Alliance for Peacebuilding, and the National Coalition for Dialogue and Deliberation.  There are dozens of other initiatives, please spread the word and support their work.  

How and when could I train with you?

I offer a 4-day mediation training at my office in Santa Monica each Fall and Spring.  I also offer public trainings on a number of topics at Pepperdine University in California, Southern Methodist University in Texas, and other universities around the country and abroad each year.   Check the Events page to find out about upcoming trainings.

I would like to include one of your online articles (or an excerpt from one of your books) in my course manual, or republish it on my blog.  What is your permission policy? 

You are welcome to republish anything I have written and have my permission, even with copyrighted materials, to do so.

What do you charge for your services?  

It depends on whether you need mediation, coaching, arbitration, consulting, dialogue facilitation, training, mentoring, or public speaking.  Here is a list of my fees.

I am dealing with big challenges in my relationship / organization. How soon would you be able to mediate?   

My mediation practice is currently pretty full, and I take only a few new clients, as I am trying to make more time to write, give talks, and facilitate critically needed dialogues.  You are welcome to fill out a request for support and services, and if I am unable to help you directly, I will recommend one of my colleagues or associates.

I am working on a great conflict resolution initiative.  Could I talk with you about it?

I am always interested in hearing about the wonderful work that others are doing and supporting it, although my current commitments do not afford me as much time as I would like to do that.  So here is what might work:  If you would send me an email with a concise bird's eye view of your project, and tell me how you would like me to help, I will let you know what I can and cannot do.

I have a blog / I write for a local paper / I am organizing a conference. Would you talk with me / speak at my event?  

I welcome opportunities to talk about the topics I feel passionately about, whenever my schedule permits.  The best way to explore this possibility is to email me, or fill out and return my Public Speaking engagement form.

I would love to read or hear your thoughts and reflections about current political events. Do you write or speak about that anywhere?

Yes, I do.  And now that I have a blog, I plan to write more publicly and regularly about opportunities to respond constructively to our conflict resolution challenges in the realm of politics.  My book, Conflict Revolution, addresses these issues directly and is available on Amazon by clicking on the title above.  In the meantime, you might like to read one of the articles I have written.

How did you get into the field of conflict resolution?  Where can I read more about your own story?

If you scroll down my bio page, you will find an excerpt from an interview where I answer that question, and here is a link to a series of Q & As about my personal journey.   If you have a question that is not addressed there, you are welcome to email me and I will do my best to answer it.

What can I do to resolve disputes myself?

There are thousands of ways we can shift our responses to conflict.  For 20 things you can do immediately to resolve your own conflicts, click here.